This is your mission, should you choose to accept it:
Spend the afternoon with an obstinate three-year old who recently started refusing to nap. Turn on the television and give her a blanket in a desperate attempt at some quiet time. Check the clock at exactly 15:40 you must turn off whatever she’s watching. It will be in the middle of her favorite episode. It doesn’t matter what you turn on. Take her kicking and screaming to the bathroom so that she will at least feel comfortable while she’s screaming at you in the car line.
Be in the car line by no later than 15:48 p.m. Yes, it’s understood that you will wait, but any later and you’ll be in the line for an extra fifteen minutes.
You will then carefully work your way around the backseat conversation. All three children will suddenly need to tell you something really important. It really doesn’t matter what you do, the three-year old is like a time bomb waiting to go off. It’s likely that the older ones will feel you in on their day over her screams.
Rush into the house and make sure all members get their homework done. Make sure there is fake homework prepared for the three-year old. Anything printed off of Nick Jr. will do in a pinch. Since the laptop is somewhere on the east coast with the husband traipsing around the country again, make sure you negotiate a treaty early for who will use the desktop and for how long.
Piano practice is high on the agenda. Glee Club practice will come next. You will need to present for not all but most even though you should be preparing dinner. Congratulate all participants and then tell the three-year old her concert can be carried out in the living room with her Dora guitar so you can finish dinner.
Have the girls clear their dishes but you get to work quickly cleaning up the kitchen. Send the big girls off to showers. They need to be cleaned up for church and Thursday morning they need to get to school for Glee Club practice and hour and half early.
In the meantime, you’ll have to tell the 10-year old to lay off when you hear her telling the three year old that she hurt her feelings. Keep the eight year old from changing 23 times before church leaving clothes fragments all over her room like a bomb has hit. Listen to the three-year old say, “Okay, Mama? Okay? Okay? Okay?” in that order for about 400 times. Then realize you don’t know what you just agreed to when you hear her a large bang and a “That was cool!”
Be ready to grab the three year old as she streaks through the house yelling, “Super Naked Girl!” so that you have a hot at getting her in a bath and cleaned up before church. You might not want to wash her hair or else every old lady at church will scold you for taking her out with a wet head.
Leave for church. Does everyone have their Bibles? Is their gum? Are we all wearing shoes?
Arrive home, in time for bed. Brush teeth and skype with Daddy. Get up the next morning and start it all over again.
Got to love our military life!