I finally broke down yesterday and headed out to the exchange to see if anyone could cut my hair. Luckily I eventually fell into Christina’s lap. I also asked her to wax my eyebrows. So here’s the deal… I think I may have learned a bit.

Christina is from Korea. I think I only understood every third word she said and she only understood about two things I said. She covered my eyes with a towel while she was washing my hair and massaging my scalp. I admit I was a little bit terrified because she was wearing a belt that looked like it was holding ninja weapons. Her scissors were seriously gleaming in the lights. She covered my face with a towel and I thought here we go… she needed a bush-hog for these eyebrows.

Apparently no bush-hog was needed but a good deal of hot wax and multiple passes with the tweezers were. Does anyone else have the urge to sneeze when their eyebrows are being plucked? It’s even worse when I do it myself. It’s a wonder I came out with any eyebrows left. She did a fabulous job and guided me to her chair where she imparted so much wisdom. Here are a few gems.

  • My children’s eyes will eventually lose their site because I do not feed them rabbit or liver on a regular basis. (Remind me to ask those Robertsons from Duck Dynasty if this is true.)
  • American children, hers included are spoiled and lazy and live with an entitlement complex. I couldn’t agree more.
  • My hair (even though I rarely color it) is terribly over processed. I tried to tell her it’s from the sun. Apparently my skin is also over processed. Hmmmm.
  • Her theory is that military families bankroll money in Hawaii then go back to the mainland and live like kings. Apparently I’m not doing it right.
  • Her son’s name is Anakin. I almost asked if the force was strong with this one. I just couldn’t bring myself to it.
  • She told me that her boy is only 5’2″ Just a hare’s breath taller than Arleigh. If he is sleeping, she doesn’t wake him for fear it will stunt his growth.

 

Please know I am having a horrible time trying not to mimic her accent and grammar. It’s fascinating. I am not making fun, I love to hear her talk.

I guess that’s it for now. I’ll have to go see her again just for another blog post.