I am currently sitting in a Starbucks waiting for my tires to be rotated. I planned ahead. I have my coffee, my Southern Living and my iPad. I’m ready to tackle Thanksgiving. I know. It’s a hard life.
Sitting here texting a friend, I’ve decided I need to forget Southern Living and Coastal Living. I need my own magazine… Military/Redneck Living. I promise I can whip up a meal that will make you want to go back for seconds and dare I say, thirds. My pie will not look like this.
My friend who happens to be in charge of pies says no Yankee can make that. Apparently rednecks can’t either.
I won’t be keeping a side dish playbook but I can explain at length how to group text a bunch of military spouses to find out what their Thanksgiving strength is and show you how to put together a meal fit for royalty.
What the heck is this squash casserole that kids will want to eat.
While I might be tempted to try it, that would not fool my kids. In spite of my best efforts yellow squash is in Bria’s words, “squishy” and the best I can hope for is that they choke it down. I love squash. I don’t know what I’m doing wrong but an artful display of goldfish would not a delicious side make in my children’s eyes.
That 1-800 number at the top… Yeah I could’ve used that 18 years ago. It was the first time I made Thanksgiving dinner and it was a hot mess! Just ask my mother. I stayed up all night making a homemade bread cornucopia filled with ham biscuits and struggled with a turkey. I made the worst stuffing that has ever been made. I was up at 4 a.m. and therefore evil. Seriously. I was the devil. Bless my parents and Ray. They choked it all down and then we went to a movie. I think I was in bed by 8 and happy as a clam on Black Friday.
Anyway, that 1-800 number is for amateurs. It’s for your first few Thanksgivings navigating rough waters. The number to call for a seasoned Thanksgiving cook is 1-800 CPT MRGN. You might have heard of the 1-800 MOR WINE number but it always causes headaches.
Navy families have an average of 4-6 kids. That means Thanksgiving is a Lord Of The Flies scenario. You must be prepared for children and single sailors. I got this.
So I’m off to plan our last Hawaiian Thanksgiving. Sigh. It will be child and single sailor friendly. There will lots of pop up tables and pie. Football is a must. It will be perfect for us. I’ve learned in my old age that when it comes to holiday gatherings it’s best to set a bar, but not to high. A low bar means our little navy ohana can soar over it. Wish me luck!