Forget Briaisms… the things flying out of my mouth these days. Let me just share a smidge of it.
“God is good. Everything He made is good. He made squash so squash is good. Eat it!”
“No, honey there aren’t mosquitos in the house. I just have a raging case of adult onset acne. They’re pimples.”
“I’m not sure where my nerves left but I may have seen them in a hand basket headed for hell. If you don’t calm down right now…” Please note that somedays I’d take 10 toddlers over 2 teens. Somedays I’d take 10 teens over two second graders… just depends on the moment.
“Attention island keiki… it’s snowing!!!”
“How does my daughter know every line to Waterboy? Thanks Tye.”
“I think you need to watch War Games so you’ll understand what’s about to happen when I go all global thermonuclear war up in here!”
“Really. They are trying to teach him tenses… ride, rode, rid…I don’t care how he says it. I just want him to communicate it.” ~ That would be after leaving a particularly harrowing speech therapy appointment.
“I’m not going to be held hostage by your toys.”
This is just a smidge of what I say on a mostly daily basis. We could be our own reality show or is it just me?